Friday, August 27, 2010

autumn breeze

autumn breeze
the sussurus
of leaves


Alan Summers said...

I always love a haiku with sussurus.

Here's a verse from a haibun:

susurrus of moths
round fire that flickers on
like the night

all my best,

The With Words International Online Haiku Competition 2010: weblink to competition page

nora said...

Thank you, Alan. I'm finding that *I* am using sussurrus too frequently, maybe as a poetic crutch. Reminds me of the use of "conjure" a decade ago. Throw it in a string of prose, and you've got a poem. :-)

Alan Summers said...

It's good that you are aware of the danger of repeating certain words.

It used to be a big fad to have "silence" or "silent"; "still" and "stillness"; and "shadows" in almost every haiku at one.

The late Peter Williams (Watford U.K.) did some great spoof haiku about these fads.

There was one about him waking up early one morning and his shadow making a cup of tea for him. ;-)

all my best

The With Words Haiku Competition 2010: weblink